I wish I could add Prince of Persia to this list.
Jumper
Jumper is a prime example of a bad producer/casting director thinking that Hayden Christensen was super hot coming off of Star Wars, thus making him an obvious choice for a super sweet movie about people who can teleport and stuff.
Why I refuse
Hayden Christensen was probably one of the worst parts of the second and third films of the Star Wars prequel trilogy. His “relationship” with Padme Portman was about as believable as a poodle falling in love with a tyrannosaurus rex, and I would much rather see that movie! Also, let’s talk briefly about how Sam Jackson phoned this one in like 80% of his films.
Kung Fu Panda
How many of these are there? Like four at this point? Three? Who cares. This is just Jack Black playing Jack Black with a handful of other celebrities getting paid to just show up around Jack Black.
Why I refuse
If I wanted to see Jack Black being ridiculous, I would just watch any real-life movie he’s in, something I prefer to not do already. With that being said, the fact that they visually filtered out Jack Black isn’t enough for me to want to see this movie. You would think that promoting actors like Jackie Chan, Lucy Liu, Seth Rogen, Angelina Jolie, or Dustin Hoffman would be a huge draw for these films. Instead, every commercial for these crapfests are plastered with JACK BLACK IN PANDA MOVIE PLAYING PANDA JACK BLACK! Let’s try and bill an actor that parents might not mind seeing too, no?
Stepbrothers
Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly play two guys who don’t like each other, and they become stepbrothers. Hilarity ensues.
Why I refuse
This one is a bit less about the movie and more out of spite. I’ll be honest, this movie is probably funny. It’s probably the sort of ridiculous film premise that I would enjoy. Unfortunately, Benny and another friend decided that the only movie they would quote from was Stepbrothers. For over a year. Oh and anytime I would say “Ha, is that a quote from something?” Those two asshats would be like “Oh it’s from Stepbrothers. It’s pretty awesome, you should probably see it.” Now, completely out of spite, I refuse to ever see that movie, because fuck you guys.